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Jan. 16th, 2010 | 11:45 am

Despite knowing I'm on track to better things and despite how well David treats me and how happy he makes me, I can't shake this feeling of distress and worthlessness regarding Luke. I still cannot understand how I could go from being so loved to being nothing like that. I put so much into that relationship (short lived as it was) and feel so cheated and betrayed and worthless.

After work Shannon (his roommate/bff) sent a message asking what was going on, and said no matter what she was there for me. I explained and totally broke down in frustrated tears right there on the street. When I got home I packed everything he gave me into a box and shipped it back to him. That helped.

I'm seeing David tonight and I think that will help too. He makes all of my self doubt and fear of worthlessness melt away because he seems to accept and fancy me exactly as I am. I deserve that, right?

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Comments {12}

The Evening Star

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from: dave_the_wave
date: Jan. 19th, 2010 06:47 am (UTC)
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hope everything feels a little better each day

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mighty-mighty-mighty

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from: hilaryann
date: Jan. 19th, 2010 01:51 pm (UTC)
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Oh it has been. Exponentially.

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